dear j.j. abrams,
you stink.
Friday, September 30, 2005
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Friday, September 23, 2005
five ugly confessions
1. i don’t change my bed sheets every week, and i regularly use the same bath towel more than once.
2. i stayed in my pajamas until 1pm today since it was my day off, which is becoming a tradition.
3. i am not running the full st. jude marathon anymore. it was taking too much time (that i didn’t have) to train for it. currently, i’m still shooting for the half.
4. i secretly like george michael’s music. (well, not so secretly now, i guess...)
5. i bought my tivo when they were offering a half-off rebate and then forgot to redeem it in the mail, thus paying full price.
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
i am martha
tonight, nick and i hosted some friends of ours at my house for dinner and to watch a recently tivo-ed college football game. fun, right?
somehow, as the time drew nearer for our friends to arrive, the panic in me started rising. my house isn’t clean enough. i should’ve mopped this weekend. i hope they don’t poke their heads into my bedroom. i wish i had more vegetables to go with this salad. this doesn’t seem like the right icecream recipe. i hope we have enough ice to go around for drinks...what if we run out?!
as the friends arrived, i kept finding things to do. mixing up lemonade, checking on dessert, making sure my dog was behaving...
when the evening was over and i was sitting and talking with nick, i found myself feeling angry towards him...and why? he had taken me grocery shopping after work, helped me clean up my house when we got home, picked up the pizzas, and even made more lemonade when we ran out. still, i felt like i had done everything all night...it had all been up to me.
poking fun, nick said, “jess, do you feel like you were martha and i was mary?”
but actually, he was dead on. i did feel like that. nick spent the evening enjoying the company of our friends and sitting in their presence while i scurried, trying to serve and do more and just “do.” the more i’ve thought about it, the more i realize i am always the martha. i am always the one who misses the ride because she’s stressing about the directions...
i want to be better about that. let go of perfectionism. let go of pleasing people. or “doing” to please God. let go of bitterness towards others who “aren’t helping as much.” let go of having to have control of a situation. i want to be mary.
i’ve always thought mary was probably a really spacey character...kind of clueless. and actually kind of lazy. she probably didn’t feel like preparing the food or making the beds or washing the dishes and that was why she was hanging out with Jesus. secretly, i’ve always thought that the stern, mothering martha did have a point--mary was such a slacker! but tonight i saw mary as nick...actually helping out and making preparations, but allowing the presence of friends to be the most important thing. laughing with them, actually listening to what they had to say, taking joy in their company. i’ve also always pictured Jesus “teaching” mary when she is found “not helping.” she chose the better choice--being educated by Jesus as she gazed at him in her spaced-out way. but what if they were just hanging out? what if he was in the middle of telling her about some wild fishing story or the latest stupid thing that peter did? what if she was just blessing him with her simple presence as a friend?
yeah, i think i’ve been wrong about that whole story. i’m thankful for the way it took on flesh and bones tonight.
somehow, as the time drew nearer for our friends to arrive, the panic in me started rising. my house isn’t clean enough. i should’ve mopped this weekend. i hope they don’t poke their heads into my bedroom. i wish i had more vegetables to go with this salad. this doesn’t seem like the right icecream recipe. i hope we have enough ice to go around for drinks...what if we run out?!
as the friends arrived, i kept finding things to do. mixing up lemonade, checking on dessert, making sure my dog was behaving...
when the evening was over and i was sitting and talking with nick, i found myself feeling angry towards him...and why? he had taken me grocery shopping after work, helped me clean up my house when we got home, picked up the pizzas, and even made more lemonade when we ran out. still, i felt like i had done everything all night...it had all been up to me.
poking fun, nick said, “jess, do you feel like you were martha and i was mary?”
but actually, he was dead on. i did feel like that. nick spent the evening enjoying the company of our friends and sitting in their presence while i scurried, trying to serve and do more and just “do.” the more i’ve thought about it, the more i realize i am always the martha. i am always the one who misses the ride because she’s stressing about the directions...
i want to be better about that. let go of perfectionism. let go of pleasing people. or “doing” to please God. let go of bitterness towards others who “aren’t helping as much.” let go of having to have control of a situation. i want to be mary.
i’ve always thought mary was probably a really spacey character...kind of clueless. and actually kind of lazy. she probably didn’t feel like preparing the food or making the beds or washing the dishes and that was why she was hanging out with Jesus. secretly, i’ve always thought that the stern, mothering martha did have a point--mary was such a slacker! but tonight i saw mary as nick...actually helping out and making preparations, but allowing the presence of friends to be the most important thing. laughing with them, actually listening to what they had to say, taking joy in their company. i’ve also always pictured Jesus “teaching” mary when she is found “not helping.” she chose the better choice--being educated by Jesus as she gazed at him in her spaced-out way. but what if they were just hanging out? what if he was in the middle of telling her about some wild fishing story or the latest stupid thing that peter did? what if she was just blessing him with her simple presence as a friend?
yeah, i think i’ve been wrong about that whole story. i’m thankful for the way it took on flesh and bones tonight.
as Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came
to a village where a woman named martha opened her home to him. she had a sister called mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. but martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. she came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? tell her to help me!”
“martha, martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (luke 10:38-42)
Saturday, September 17, 2005
you think you know, but you have no idea
wow. can I just say that I love my friends? one whiney little post, and as a result, i had a fun-filled day of blog reading! (the squeaky wheel gets the grease?) truth be told, i was just feeling a little bored and lonely, and i am sorry for taking it out on you, the readers of my blog, whomever you might be, known or anonymous.
kelly schepp/hov raised a good point. how much blogging do you have to do to be a good blogger? (she says according to me, it is hourly! but i actually might end up complaining about that, because in reality, all jokes aside, who really has time to read blogs by the hour? i would get so far behind that i would stop reading and stop caring, and then i would feel guilty. so thanks for blogging in moderation, friends!) i think to answer kel’s question, it all goes back to the reason why i read blogs: it’s nice getting a little update on people’s thoughts and lives every now and then. so if you’re reading this, and you’re a busy person, and you felt like i was chastising you and you felt guilt and shame...GOOD. not really, just kidding! i just love reading about you...yes, YOU! so, “every now and then”, in my definition, equals frequent enough to keep people from wondering if something’s happened to you. once a week? twice? couple times a month? i will try working on that myself...
on another note, i would like to say that i ate corky’s bbq last night, and it was gooo-oood. their rolls are to die for, and the sweet tea was just right. and if you’re living somewhere besides memphis, and you think you know what i’m talking about...you don’t. it’s like saying you’ve eaten homemade icecream, when in reality, you’ve only eaten bluebell’s “homemade icecream.” trust me.
kelly schepp/hov raised a good point. how much blogging do you have to do to be a good blogger? (she says according to me, it is hourly! but i actually might end up complaining about that, because in reality, all jokes aside, who really has time to read blogs by the hour? i would get so far behind that i would stop reading and stop caring, and then i would feel guilty. so thanks for blogging in moderation, friends!) i think to answer kel’s question, it all goes back to the reason why i read blogs: it’s nice getting a little update on people’s thoughts and lives every now and then. so if you’re reading this, and you’re a busy person, and you felt like i was chastising you and you felt guilt and shame...GOOD. not really, just kidding! i just love reading about you...yes, YOU! so, “every now and then”, in my definition, equals frequent enough to keep people from wondering if something’s happened to you. once a week? twice? couple times a month? i will try working on that myself...
on another note, i would like to say that i ate corky’s bbq last night, and it was gooo-oood. their rolls are to die for, and the sweet tea was just right. and if you’re living somewhere besides memphis, and you think you know what i’m talking about...you don’t. it’s like saying you’ve eaten homemade icecream, when in reality, you’ve only eaten bluebell’s “homemade icecream.” trust me.
Friday, September 16, 2005
arg
dear friends,
please post on your blogs! i check every hour, on the hour, frantic that i might have missed something new. as you can imagine, this gets pretty redundant when the same post is up there, day after day. that’s hours and hours of the same posts!
save me from monotony!
ps: if i had a dollar for every time someone said, “you had me at ‘jim brinkerhoff’...the man is a legend, i say, shaking my head.
please post on your blogs! i check every hour, on the hour, frantic that i might have missed something new. as you can imagine, this gets pretty redundant when the same post is up there, day after day. that’s hours and hours of the same posts!
save me from monotony!
ps: if i had a dollar for every time someone said, “you had me at ‘jim brinkerhoff’...the man is a legend, i say, shaking my head.
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
held hostage by paper
i have been captured by a book for the past four days.
when leslie guinn handed “redeeming love” by francine rivers to me (and made me put this big honkin book in my purse during a wedding reception, i might add!), i was a little skeptical. i had read one of rivers’ books a while ago and wasn’t a big fan. i thought she was a little overrated. and when i started this book, the first chapter had me feeling a little unsure. but i figured, leslie’s an english major--i usually trust her judgement...so i kept on reading.
a few days later, i have just finished, and my heart is exploding. “redeeming love” has challenged the way i think about love...about God’s passionate pursuit of me...of how i model that love to the people around me...of the idols that i place above Him in my life, all to often.
i might be the last person on the face of the planet to have read it, but if you by chance have missed reading this intense fictional retelling of the story of hosea, i strongly recommend getting caught up in its pages! be warned, however, that the story of hosea is a little scandalous (pg-13!)...and also be warned that it just might change your entire outlook on the way love is to be given and received!
when leslie guinn handed “redeeming love” by francine rivers to me (and made me put this big honkin book in my purse during a wedding reception, i might add!), i was a little skeptical. i had read one of rivers’ books a while ago and wasn’t a big fan. i thought she was a little overrated. and when i started this book, the first chapter had me feeling a little unsure. but i figured, leslie’s an english major--i usually trust her judgement...so i kept on reading.
a few days later, i have just finished, and my heart is exploding. “redeeming love” has challenged the way i think about love...about God’s passionate pursuit of me...of how i model that love to the people around me...of the idols that i place above Him in my life, all to often.
i might be the last person on the face of the planet to have read it, but if you by chance have missed reading this intense fictional retelling of the story of hosea, i strongly recommend getting caught up in its pages! be warned, however, that the story of hosea is a little scandalous (pg-13!)...and also be warned that it just might change your entire outlook on the way love is to be given and received!
"come, let us return to the LORD...let us press on to know him..." (hosea 6:1,3)
Thursday, September 08, 2005
musings (aka: attack of the yellow jackets)
very funny, matt.
while it looks like auburn has dispelled any rumors of gaining another perfect season, our weekend tour of favorite places was still a good one. pre-game was spent in montgomery with kristy dean-soon-to-be-crawford and her fiancé, patrick with a few hours of sweet auburn, alabama thrown in there for good measure. (lunch with daniel mundie & ben blanchard, hellos at the acsc, and a quick catch-up with amy & rocky oliver) then up to atlanta, where we were delightfully distracted from a painful game by ibby & erin nasmyth. i know i’m doing a little name dropping, but i love my friends and just wanted to say, “holla!” we also enjoyed a little time with my fabulous parents, though brief. and they really are fabulous. (HOLLA, mom & dad!)
it’s fun sharing my friends (with nick). i sometimes agonize over how i wish that he was more a part of my past, of my history, of whatever roots i have. but it’s also fun letting that unfold before someone. to watch them begin enjoying what you have always enjoyed in your friends, your school, your family... to see surprise or wonder or amusement when they hear old memories recounted.
“jane austen book club”: thumbs up.
okay, i know the only mention i’ve made of katrina was before the magnitude of it had hit. before anyone had heard how bad it was... it tore me up, just like it probably tore you up. but i’m katrina-d out. not to say i’m done helping or being concerned or having compassion. i just can’t bring it in here. (for some reason, i feel a little bit guilty about that.)
on a lighter note, today was an important day! my friends (and perhaps yours), russ & amy turman, had their second child today: jack milam turman. happy birthday jack! man, i love that family to pieces. congrats to big brother, cooper. what a crazy thing to hold a just-born baby in your arms. liiiiiitle fingernails. when i think of peace, that’s what i think of. (not fingernails...babies.) i know...you’re thinking to yourselves that i OBVIOUSLY do not have children because babies can be really NOT peaceful! but what i mean is, when i ask God to send me the peace of His Spirit, i desire the feeling i had as i held a sleeping jack in my arms this afternoon. doesn’t it just make you want to sigh?
while it looks like auburn has dispelled any rumors of gaining another perfect season, our weekend tour of favorite places was still a good one. pre-game was spent in montgomery with kristy dean-soon-to-be-crawford and her fiancé, patrick with a few hours of sweet auburn, alabama thrown in there for good measure. (lunch with daniel mundie & ben blanchard, hellos at the acsc, and a quick catch-up with amy & rocky oliver) then up to atlanta, where we were delightfully distracted from a painful game by ibby & erin nasmyth. i know i’m doing a little name dropping, but i love my friends and just wanted to say, “holla!” we also enjoyed a little time with my fabulous parents, though brief. and they really are fabulous. (HOLLA, mom & dad!)
it’s fun sharing my friends (with nick). i sometimes agonize over how i wish that he was more a part of my past, of my history, of whatever roots i have. but it’s also fun letting that unfold before someone. to watch them begin enjoying what you have always enjoyed in your friends, your school, your family... to see surprise or wonder or amusement when they hear old memories recounted.
“jane austen book club”: thumbs up.
okay, i know the only mention i’ve made of katrina was before the magnitude of it had hit. before anyone had heard how bad it was... it tore me up, just like it probably tore you up. but i’m katrina-d out. not to say i’m done helping or being concerned or having compassion. i just can’t bring it in here. (for some reason, i feel a little bit guilty about that.)
on a lighter note, today was an important day! my friends (and perhaps yours), russ & amy turman, had their second child today: jack milam turman. happy birthday jack! man, i love that family to pieces. congrats to big brother, cooper. what a crazy thing to hold a just-born baby in your arms. liiiiiitle fingernails. when i think of peace, that’s what i think of. (not fingernails...babies.) i know...you’re thinking to yourselves that i OBVIOUSLY do not have children because babies can be really NOT peaceful! but what i mean is, when i ask God to send me the peace of His Spirit, i desire the feeling i had as i held a sleeping jack in my arms this afternoon. doesn’t it just make you want to sigh?
Friday, September 02, 2005
fight on ye orange and blue
well, it’s about that time.
you may not be able to smell it in the air just yet (seeing as it’s still stifling hot), but the time has come for COLLEGE FOOTBALL! wahooooo!
you may not know this about me yet, but i am a huge auburn fan. huge.
class of ’02 huge.
cheered them through some loser years huge.
had a crush on ben leard before he was good huge.
wouldn’t miss rolling toomer’s corner huge.
we are the REAL national champions huge.
“we hail thee auburn and we vow to work for thy just fame” huge.
“i believe in auburn AND LOVE IT!” huge.
nick and i at the au/georgia game last year (oh, and we won...just in case you were wondering. but of course you weren't wondering, because everyone knows that we were UNDEFEATED last year!!)
so anyways...
nick and i are making a pilgrimage this weekend to auburn and atlanta--my two favorite “home” places. we may pay $50 a gallon for gas (i saw a sign on the news that said, "get robbed legally--buy gas!"), but by golly we will get there and have fun doing it! if we’re extra lucky, we may score some free tickets to the auburn/ga tech game. (pass them our way, friends!) regardless, we will be doing a respectable amount of tailgating on the loveliest village on the plains. then up to atl to spend a couple days with the fam. i can’t wait.
see you soon, mom!
you may not be able to smell it in the air just yet (seeing as it’s still stifling hot), but the time has come for COLLEGE FOOTBALL! wahooooo!
you may not know this about me yet, but i am a huge auburn fan. huge.
class of ’02 huge.
cheered them through some loser years huge.
had a crush on ben leard before he was good huge.
wouldn’t miss rolling toomer’s corner huge.
we are the REAL national champions huge.
“we hail thee auburn and we vow to work for thy just fame” huge.
“i believe in auburn AND LOVE IT!” huge.
nick and i at the au/georgia game last year (oh, and we won...just in case you were wondering. but of course you weren't wondering, because everyone knows that we were UNDEFEATED last year!!)
so anyways...
nick and i are making a pilgrimage this weekend to auburn and atlanta--my two favorite “home” places. we may pay $50 a gallon for gas (i saw a sign on the news that said, "get robbed legally--buy gas!"), but by golly we will get there and have fun doing it! if we’re extra lucky, we may score some free tickets to the auburn/ga tech game. (pass them our way, friends!) regardless, we will be doing a respectable amount of tailgating on the loveliest village on the plains. then up to atl to spend a couple days with the fam. i can’t wait.
see you soon, mom!
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