a little and a lot

Wednesday, May 19, 2010


I know, I know. I said I was going radio-silent about the adoption, and then I went radio-silent all-together. I didn't really, I was just busy.

So guess what? I have walking pneumonia.

I think Memphis in May (the city and month, not the event) is trying to kill me. This is the third year that my health has crashed in May. I have developed a crazy allergy to something that doesn't bloom until May, apparently. This year, although I was already taking Zyrtec, stepped it up to Zyrtec-D and added Mucinex, I was no match for the mystery-allergen.

You know when you bump your leg into something and it hurts so dang bad and then there isn't even a mark the next day, even though it hurts? Or when you feel like you could die and surely it's the flu and you go to the doctor and he says it's just a cold? Walking pneumonia isn't like that. It sounds bad. And that is gratifying. Because it feels bad. :)

Hey, this is random, but I'm reading this book and I really like it so far:

(Paul Miller's "A Praying Life")

I thought I'd share this quote with you because I read it today and it encouraged me in a backwards way:

"We tell ourselves, 'Strong Christians pray a lot. If I were a stronger Christian, I'd pray more.' Strong Christians do pray more, but they pray more because they realize how weak they are. They don't try to hide it from themselves. Weakness is a channel that allows them to access grace. I'm not referring to well-known Christians. An interviewer once asked Edith Schaeffer, author and wife of evangelist and philosopher Francis Schaeffer, 'Who is the greatest Christian woman alive today?' She replied, 'We don't know her name. She is dying of cancer somewhere in a hospital in India.' I'm talking about that woman. Underneath her obedient life is a sense of helplessness. It has become part of her very nature...almost like breathing. Why? Because she is weak. She can feel her restless heart, her tendency to compare herself with others. She is shocked at how jealousy can well up in her. She notices how easily the world gets its hooks into her. In short, she distrusts herself. When she looks at other people, she sees the same struggles. The world, the flesh, and the Devil are too much for her. The result? Her heart cries out to God in prayer. She needs Jesus."

Amen and amen.

Less weird posts coming in the future, friends... :)


WendyLou said...

So glad you're back! And so bummed that you're not feeling well :(

Larissa Smith said...

I have come to realize that one aspect of growing in Christian maturity is acknowledging how immature you still are. Good quote. Thanks for sharing.

Jane said...

I sure hope you get to feeling better soon! That does not sound fun. And thank you for the quote from "A Praying Life." That is good stuff. I might need to purchase that book and read the whole thing!

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